Restraint & release

You should ask why someone with autism might choose to be tied with rope, in the traditional form of Shibari.

At 29, V was skiing, running, lifting weights, managing a professional team with a master’s degree and a sharp analytical mind. Then one mosquito bite which led to Ross River virus changed everything. Chronic fatigue, POTS, Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, mast cell activation, and a growing list of allergies pulled V out of their life and into a wheelchair.

V is also a parent of two kids on the autism spectrum. Through them and their work with Seraphina, a neurodivergent support worker V began to see the quiet truth of their own neurodivergence. The decades of masking. The constant calibration to meet others' expectations. The fatigue of pretending.

Traditionally a Japanese decorative rope art, often misunderstood as purely kink, Shibari for V has become something else: a practice of trust, control, release. The sensation of being bound offers deep pressure, which some autistic brains craves. The patterns appeal to V’s analytical mind. The sessions planned in collaboration with Seraphina are quiet, focused, consensual. Every knot is a negotiation. Every wrap is an act of presence.

“It’s something I can do sitting down at home. It’s about leverage, not strength. And it’s helped me feel like I’m back in my body.”